Show Discussion: The Crystal Maze

By | April 15, 2018

Fridays Sundays, 8pm,
Channel 4

No point giving Series 1 Block 3 a new post, so I’m bumping this one up instead.

(The post for the Celeb editions and the several hundred comments they generated can be found here).

And so we come to the year’s main event, the civilian run of The Crystal Maze.

Merely two months ago, 22 years of excitement and hope, bolstered by two years of advertising by other people, broke down to “I mean, it’s alright,” and “I really think this should be better”, now we meet the 15-episode civilian run with a sort of non-committal nod of the head and a disinterested “Oh, OK then.”

We’ve already seen most of the games. We get that Richard Ayoade is hosting seemingly under the impression it’s not very good. Can it turn things around in having fewer games to focus on the personalities of the contestants?

It’s probably wise not to read too much into the overnights for this (although it will be difficult to spin “around a million” into a positive), but watch-out instead for how many it adds in +7 catch-up as a trend, where it had been adding a great deal.

228 thoughts on “Show Discussion: The Crystal Maze

    1. SamB

      I enjoyed this episode, probably my favourite so far – fun team who seemed like they weren’t trying too hard to be fun or clever, but played quite intelligently.

      A shame not seeing any new games – and it’s also a bit boring knowing which game it’s going to be as soon as they’re outside the cell. I think I’m right in saying the water cell in Aztec is the only cell that’s had two different games in?

      Reply
      1. Brig Bother Post author

        Not at all, in fact it has had three – scales, wet log and put the bricks in the idol. Similarly the airlock room in Futuristic has planets, guillotine lasers and avoid knocking the asteroids.

        There are about five games still to be seen, and Jessica Hynes hasn’t showed up in a civvy episode yet.

        Reply
        1. Danny Kerner

          Yeah they seem to have ignored the Medieval entrance this half of the series. People’s theory that the Celebrity run was filmed last looks to be true. Maybe she was hired Midway through recording which explains her absence from the first 8 civil series

          Reply
        2. SamB

          I hadn’t registered that the airlock room was all the same room, actually, but that makes sense.

          Reply
      2. Alex

        There’s one cell in Industrial that I believe is the “we’ve ran out of ideas room”, because that’s had I believe the clocks game, the phones game and the ‘connect the boxes’ game.

        Reply
        1. Danny Kerner

          And the lights out game as well. Like I said they should run a competition for people to send their game ideas. Winners get to see their idea come to reality

          Reply
        2. SamB

          Are they all the same room? Didn’t realise that. Are there three rooms on that stretch, or just two? (The lights out one, plus the one with the rotating platforms)?

          Reply
          1. Danny Kerner

            Just two. Two at the front, two at the back one on the side by entrance and of course the pipe maze behind the stairs

    2. Danny Kerner

      Yeah awkward numbers this week. I’m trying to think what might have caused this huge dip from last week. I think the Richard effect is the blame along with the repetition of games. A whole zone this week being ALIS. Poor planning on the producers front there.

      Reply
      1. David

        Here’s the situation: ALIS. Almost Like It Sucks. It should have been an easy show to knock out of the park, in spite of its large scale for what is essentially a studio-based game show a la The Cube, but instead we have… this. A bare minimum of actual gameplay featuring games that are generally underwhelming and repetitive, bookended by an absurd amount of filler (no, we don’t need a ‘how are you feeling?’ interview right before the start of every single game) and an even more absurd amount of abortive and unpopular catchphrases, with a host who’s being deliberately impersonable and giving off the impression he doesn’t want to be there, plus copious fourth-wall breaking, plus production design decisions that make the entire thing LOOK like a cheap and nasty piece of TV filler that’s only there to stop fans complaining.

        They have made LITERALLY every possible error they could have made with this show, and then some. The question isn’t what caused the ratings to tank so suddenly, the question is why it took so long in the first place.

        Reply
        1. Brig Bother Post author

          Difficult to argue with. Although ratings have tanked pretty much since the last celeb special.

          You are no longer making the Nostalgic Ironic Crystal Maze One-Off, you are now making The Crystal Maze with its legacy to live up to.

          Reply
          1. Kester J

            I commented to my partner during last night’s episode that if I’m honest with myself, the only reason I’m still watching is the forlorn hope that it might become good.

          2. Brig Bother Post author

            You go into forums and there are people claiming it’s just as good as the original, which suggests they’ve never watched the original.

  1. Danny Kerner

    I have had an idea regarding making transitioning zones more believable if C4 recommission. In the case of Futuristic to Aztec, if they use one of the other side doors to build a fake lift set they can use that, so when they transfer to the Aztec set they can pickup from that lift set which can open up into the wall element and if they can make it a Two way system then there is still the believable element there. If they still want to do a random zone choice then they still use the transportation graphic. For Industrial to Aztec if they build a pipe track in whatever available space is left in the studio they can do the old fake trick of cutting from the Industrial set pipe to this maze track & then cut to the entrance way of Aztec. Again a believable element is now created. Like I said this could only be utilized if S2 is commissioned.

    Reply
  2. Brig Bother Post author

    It’s the most exciting time of the week, the All-in stats!

    Team Well Read And Underfed: 15th for C4 for the week, 1.553m otal (slight increase!) 1.007m live, 162k +1, 384k Timeshift (that’s up on last week), 30th for week in A16-34 with 460k, making it not as good as Hollyoaks on E4 but better then The Simpsons.

    So there we are.

    Reply
  3. Brig Bother Post author

    It’s the last of the first half of the series tonight, a team from Wales who all used to work in a Pizza Hut. One of Richard’s better episodes I thought.

    But don’t despair! The Official Christmas Cash-in Book is already down to £7 in hardcover from £15 on Amazon (in fact it’s £7.49 on Kindle, wharraswizz viewers), and that’s out next Thursday.

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/Crystal-Maze-Challenge-Games-Begin-ebook/dp/B072W48W6K/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1507896219&sr=8-1&keywords=crystal+maze

    Reply
    1. Danny Kerner

      Confirmed return Dec 2017 for at least the Xmas special. Whether it carries on the week after we will soon see.

      Reply
        1. Danny Kerner

          If they are sticking to the Friday format i presume it will be broadcast either 22nd or 29th December. Any earlier than the 22nd will feel too early. From what we know that if they try to run it on either three days of the 24th 25th or 26th it will be drowned out by other programmes on the BBC such as Doctor Who, Eastenders & Mrs Brown (all three pretty much guaranteed on Xmas Day)

          Reply
  4. Will Tennant

    Very disappointed by the episode, not so much for Richard but the team was just very unenthusiastic to all the games, it just made it very boring to watch, and I never thought i’d say that about the Crystal Maze

    Reply
    1. Kester J

      I was surprised this team made it through casting, given how much of a point was made about the number of applications received. It was almost like watching something that’s been made so the contestants can go home and tell their mates they’ve been on the Crystal Maze, rather than to make an entertaining show for viewers.

      Reply
    2. SamB

      Yes, that was incredibly dull to watch. There’s very little worse to watch than people being slow and standing around not accomplishing anything. Bethan was relatively fun and engaging (and was the only one to really get on with it when going into the room, as shown on the water log game), the rest… what a waste of a slot.

      Reply
  5. Alex McMillan

    I really, really wish this hadn’t been so much of a struggle to keep up with.

    It’s strange, I still feel like I’m waiting for The Crystal Maze to come back.

    Reply
  6. Brig Bother Post author

    Right, Footballers Team, 1.2m all-in, 17th for the week.

    Thinkbox hasn’t updated with a breakdown yet.

    Edit: Here we go.

    800k live, 119k +1, 281k on catch up for 1.199m total.

    42nd for all channels in A16-34, 355k, putting it slightly ahead of Family Chase and Grand Designs but well behind Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away! on Five.

    Reply
  7. Brig Bother Post author

    Before it drops off the list of recent new shows there’s just time for our favourite Crystal Maze “it’s just as good if not better than the original” consolidated ratings!

    Final episode of series 1b:
    C4’s 14th for week, 1.39m total (well up on week previous), 896k live, 146k +1, 348k catch-up.

    35th for week in A16-34 with 451k, again up on previous week.

    And since nobody asked, how’s the book doing? The Hbk is 2,010th on Amazon (but #7 in trivia and #9 in TV Tie-in Humour), the Kindle edition is #140,481. Although I’d buy the hardback over the Kindle version as well if I had a second chance.

    Reply
  8. Brig Bother Post author

    Just one little extra fillip to this. How did Food Unwrapped and Travel Man: 48 Hours in Rome do?

    Food Unwrapped:
    14th for C4 for the week, 1.14m live, 158k +1, 152k catch-up for a total of 1.462m
    Doesn’t appear in Top 50 A16-34.

    Travel Man:
    7th for Channel 4 for the week 1.33m live, 216k +1, 530k catch-up for a total of 2.079m.
    36th in all TV for A16-34, 428k.

    Reply
  9. Chris M. Dickson

    Polling wonkery site 538 asks a question about The Price is Right and, to wrestle this comment onto the topic for this page, further down answers the question that MAYBE EVEN LITERALLY nobody was asking: how do you play the totem pole dragon game perfectly? There’s a pretty chart and everything.

    Reply
  10. Danny Kerner

    The official Xmas lineup has been officially confirmed to be nearly all the celebrities I said a few weeks ago. These are:
    Red- Ellie Simons (Paralympic swimmer)
    Yellow- Tom Davis (Murder in Successville Actor)
    Green- Nicola Adams (Former Gold Olympic boxer)
    Blue- Mollie King (Former Saturdays singer & current contestant in Strictly)
    Purple- Ollie Locke (Made in Chelsea Actor?)

    One thing to note is how they are going to adapt the two games Ellie will play due to height issues.

    Reply
    1. Danny Kerner

      We have a date. Thursday 14th December. We presume a 48hr advance watch will be made available on the 12th December at 9:01pm. Will be interesting to see what they have done to the set to call it christmasy. We know the dome will be turned into a snow globe. And games will be adapted for height in the case of Ellie.

      Reply
  11. Danny Kerner

    From what i have seen of the Xmas special. It seems it took all season untill the show got the correct feel & flow. From all 10 ten games which have had a xmas style quest thrown in place, one is new. This may be changed to a regular topic for regular editions. I liked this celebrity bunch & didn’t feel forced at all. Why they couldn’t wait untill 2018 to start with this episode as a warm up i don’t know.

    Reply
      1. Danny Kerner

        No i mean this was broadcast at xmas & the rest to be shown in 2018. Should of explained that better.

        Reply
  12. Jonathan

    Well, I know we speculated if they’d mix up the new recording and these ones to reduce the impact of the repeated games… but by gosh they found the perfect episode to come back with. I think knowing the games impacted the shouting at the TV factor even more, though, it’d have been remarkable without it.

    What a performance. What a performance.

    Reply
    1. Will Tennant

      I agree, this was a perfect episode to come back with, even though we had seen all the games, it didn’t feel forced if that makes sense.

      Although giving them a ALIS on game 1 is a bit harsh don’t you think?!

      Reply
  13. Alex

    If ever there was an episode to end with “thank you for watching, if indeed you still are”, that was it. Jesus.

    Although, chronologically, Adil Ray was the first person to be locked in twice.

    Reply
    1. Danny Kerner

      It’s definitely going to be mentioned in Gogglebox on Friday however not sure which segment(s) will be used. It might also explain why no preview ep was on Thanks 4. It might return to normal come Fri. Also new sponsor for this block of episodes however this maybe the generic sponsor for programs.

      Reply
  14. Score

    1.14m (5.5%) excluding +1. Will be 1.3-1.4m total.

    Not great but a small improvement.

    Reply
    1. Brig Bother Post author

      Yes, I feared less.

      It feels quite sad that around a million for the bloody Crystal Maze is considered OK.

      Reply
      1. Score

        It is rather sad, but when you compare it to Blind Date doing 800,000 on C5 it doesn’t look so bad!

        Broadcast has a bit more detail:

        “The Crystal Maze (Channel 4) 8pm-9pm1.3m (6.2%)

        RDF TV’s physical gameshow proved a slightly bigger draw on Sunday night than in its old home, but still fell short of C4’s 1.5m (7.1%) slot average.

        The first non-celebrity version of the show aired to 1.1m (6.1%) in an 8pm Friday slot in August. The run went on to average 1.1m (5.7%) over eight weeks.

        Some 33% of last night’s viewers were 16-34, up from C4’s 13% slot average. This was slightly ahead of August’s opener, which had a 28% 16-34 profile.

        The show gave C4 a 16% share of 16-34s, more than double its 7% slot average.”

        Those demographics plus the strong catch up numbers ought to be enough to keep it around.

        Reply
        1. Danny Kerner

          For now yes but don’t expect it beyond 2020 to last unless they rebrand and introduce the interconnected sections of the maze & change zones. People on twitter are calling for ocean however it won’t be plausible unless they can get a water tank.

          Reply
  15. Brekkie

    So they were the first to reach the dome with zero Crystals but considering they bought three people out along the way are they the team to have actually won the least amount of Crystals?

    And shame on the British Public for not watching this in far greater numbers.

    Reply
    1. Will Tennant

      They are joint last in terms of grabbing crystals, albeit 3 from 10 games, there was one episode in the old series where 1 team got 3 crystals out of 13 games… (2 lock ins on top which left them with 1.)

      Reply
    1. John R

      The problem I have is they’ve taken so long to just show the thing that it isn’t must watch TV for me, I’ll just catch up with it whenever as pretty much every episode feels virtually the same just with different faces! Richard is OK but his repetitive ‘ALIS situation, tonight Matthew I’m going to be…’ commentary has worn a bit thin now too.

      Last night they didn’t even bother to edit the remark out that ‘This is 2017!’, and as for a French person being forced to play the riddle game…

      Reply
    2. Danny Kerner

      Shocking. I can’t believe it. It surely can’t get any worse than this. The deaf contestants are this Sunday (29th April). Maybe they should of got Steven back.

      Reply
      1. Will Tennant

        Biggest problem I think is a 20 episode block of the same games vs a 14 episode block of the classic series, not enough games to cause variety, though was nice to see a couple of rarer games from this series.

        With series 2 confirmed for 12 episodes, should be better for variety.

        Reply
        1. David

          Even then though… we were promised “over 60” new games when the relaunch began all those months and months (and months) ago. We’re currently at 38, and 27 of them appeared for the first time in the initial set of celebrity specials. Where are all the rest?

          Reply
          1. Danny Kerner

            Not quite. The first initial amount of games designed were 60 but was cut down to 41 for recording purposes. 19 didn’t quite make the cut for fun & interesting gameplay. We still are due 3 more games this series. One of which may be coming up this week. Deaf contestants equal complications on certain games.

  16. Brig Bother Post author

    Right so the deaf team get nine three-minute games (and a 2.5m one) and we’re told they can’t fit twelve in.

    Reply
    1. John R

      I’ll catch up on it later, I was too busy watching The ALIS Maze

      Reply
    1. Danny Kerner

      Well from this week (6th May) the timeslot is bumped down to 7pm. It will be interesting to see if it affects viewership ratings.

      Reply
  17. Brig Bother Post author

    Yep, this isn’t on on the 13th, Spanish Grand Prix Highlights are on instead. Limping to the chequered flag a bit.

    Reply
  18. Danny Kerner

    I have just heard some information from the production team that 30 new games have been developed for season 2. That’s the right sort of figure for a 12 ep run. Don’t you agree Bother?

    Reply
  19. Danny Kerner

    Anyone noticed that the Lazer grid maze was made a no conferring game so late into the run. Also with 3 episodes left we still haven’t seen any of the new games. Will it be a case of one new game per episode or all three games will be in the remaining episodes together. Must mention that next week has been removed for F1 racing highlights since C4 didn’t mention it at all.

    Reply
    1. Will Tennant

      It feels more like this was recorded very early in the run just with times on some of the games completely different to the norm I think and Richard seeming a more relaxed character (not doing mannerisms with the hands for instance). Not to mention it would make more sense if they did no conferring first then allowed it afterwards knowing it didn’t really matter then the other way round.

      Reply
  20. Brig Bother Post author

    I know it’s a bank holiday and it was hot and on on a different timeslot, but last night’s episode if big budget revival The Crystal Maze was under half a million exc +1.

    To think you all laughed at me when I said after ep 1 it wasn’t good enough.

    Reply
    1. Will Tennant

      To be fair I don’t think we were expecting so volatile shifts in programming, it almost feels like Doctor Who in the 80s with all the timetable shifts it’s had this year!

      Let’s hope the 2nd season bounces back or we may not see a Season 3 with these ratings (unless they decide to make it a teatime weekday escapade?) :-/

      Reply
  21. Will Tennant

    Im wondering if they’ll be showing these as repeats on the Summer slots during daytime/evening? I remember vividly during the late 90s they showed these on the summer holidays in the mornings.

    Would a 5pm slot on the repeats be a nail in the coffin or would it actually help in the long run?

    Reply
    1. Danny Kerner

      I hope so as there is no sign of a dvd/bluray release. I ideally want Netflix to get it & posibly reboot it again. 60 minutes should of been 1hr 15. Bakeoff got its1hr extended to fit the show like a BBC broadcast. They should of done it here. Each break a zone and final break the dome. Challenge & other countries might ike this timing too.

      Reply
  22. Danny Kerner

    They are resting the maze again. It’s not back next Sunday (20th May). They might not show the final 3 until season 2 is ready.

    Reply

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