I walked into a newsagents the other day to buy a bag of Maltesers. When I got up to the counter, they charged me £24 for them. "Twenty-four quid!" says I, "do I look like a mug?"
Needless to say I was quite surprised when they pulled out a Toby Jug with my exact likeness on it. So obviously I paid up and left.
Blank Screen is an "innovative" "new" "show" broadcast late at night as five minute filler. The premise as described in highlight articles was that they'd be a blank screen for a couple of minutes and then a question and a telephone number would suddenly flash up for people to call. They'd win £500 and that would be it - next programme.
What we've actually got is "comedy". We are treated to a "comedy" title sequence. We're treated to a "comedy" commentary (accept, of course, it's a commentary of a blank screen! Brilliant.). We're treated to a ridiculously easy mobile phone text question (to which the lines close every Sunday at six).
Hilariously, the one thing we're never actually treated to is a blank screen. The blank screen of the title actually has a moving Blank Screen logo in one of the corners. And rather than the blank screen being on for about a minute, possibly heightening tension in a text reaction test sort of way (which as we've previously discussed, it isn't anyway) it's on for about 20 seconds and the commentator (who appears to be a bloke called Marcus Birdman) tells us the question's coming anyway. It's not quite what we were expecting, like when I went into the newsies that time.
In summary then, other than a greedy way for ITV1 to make some easy text money - in which case it has no respect whatsoever for viewers - we're baffled as to what entertainment value or, indeed, point this show has.