What’s on the board, Miss Ford?

• The Bother Series of Poker Event 2 (Sunday, Full Tilt, 8pm GMT/1500 ET) – the discussion page for this week’s game is here.
• The Amazing Race (Sunday, CBS) – Well, a week after the first episode and I can’t remember many of the teams except for Mario and Luigi the detectives (one of them is probably called Bob, they always are) and Team Lesbian. That probably makes them my favourites by default.
• Only Connect (Monday, BBC4, 8:30pm) – it’s the final heat of this this week and this week’s cleverly diametrically opposed types are the Booksellers vs Bowlers. I don’t know how the next round has been drawn so expect lots of amusing and inaccurate guesswork.
• The Krypton Factor (Tuesday, ITV1, 7:30pm) – it’s the first semi-final! Ratings for this haven’t really held up that well, but I’d like to see it come back for a third series and put right what went wrong this time round.
• Survivor (Thursday, CBS) – well embarrassingly I haven’t watched ep 2 yet, I was meant to last night, but instead the new The Pet Shop Boys live DVD came through the post so I watched that instead, and as such I intend to wear a cardboard box over my head for most of the next week. I’m sure it is very good though, and will probably watch it later.
• The Bubble (Friday, BBC2, 10pm) – To be honest doesn’t deserve to be here but I put it here just so I can say that I thought it was neither good nor bad, it’s a bit like what you’d expect the TV equivilent of sensual deprivation to be. Which is sort of ironic.
• Ant and Dec’s Push the Button (Saturday, ITV1, 7:45pm) – this should be quite good fun, basically two families taking on several tasks whilst a £100,000 money clock counts down and likely to have a few entertaining Ant and Dec cheeky twists. This is actually recording on Thursday, if anyone’s going do please feel free to do a recording report – I’m not interested in spoilers of results, but I’m always intrigued by the format and what you think of it. I know contestants are asked not to divulge stuff on the internet, two words: assumed name, and don’t say anything that makes it obvious it’s you. So twelve words really. I would go down to this myself, but I’ve only got so much leave and wages, generous as my leave allowance is. Also it’s at rather audience-unfriendly Pinewood. Admittedly, so is The Whole 19 Yards, but that should finish early enough to catch the last train, y’know? In theory. Anyway, it would be quite good if the theme for this was ‘Push the Button’, the controversial Israeli Eurovision entry by Teapacks from a few years ago.
• Solitary v4.0 (Saturday, Fox Reality) – Well last week we had the hilarious game of “input these phrases into the computer where each letter on the keyboard stands for a different letter on screen, deleting everything if you type the wrong one in” (needless to say, I’d be fascinated to know if someone did accidentally type “This sucks Vag” genuinely or someone on the production team has quite an amusingly risqué sense of humour) followed by the always fun Twister meets Laserquest meets neck pain treatment. Again, I’d be quite interested to know how many rounds of a treatment the producers have prepared beforehand, and if there are some sort of hard-and-fast rules they have to use on the fly if the contestants are a bit hardier than originally thought. Anyway, this is episode five, which I predict to be like episode four, but with one less person in it.