Alright then:

• The Cube (6:45pm, Sunday, ITV1)
• The X Factor JLS! Take That! Westlife. (8pm, Sunday ITV1)
• I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! Series nine, episode one. (9pm, Sunday ITV1)
• Only Connect Officially jumps the shark this weeek with its first celebrity special for Children in Need. God why do celebrities have to be in everything? It’s the Wheel Men vs The Larks, although for some reason I had it in my head as the “wheeltappers” vs “the shunters”, for obvious reasons. (8:30pm, Monday, BBC4)
• The Apprentice Proving that advertising isn’t as easy as it looks last week. (9pm, Wednesday, BBC1)
• The Challenge: Cutthroat (Wednesday, MTV)
• Children in Need Night includes Celebrity Mastermind on BBC2 at 10pm and probably A Question Of Have QI Got Buzzcocks For You All Over, inevitably. (Friday night from 7pm on BBC1 and BBC2)

There are three things you could be doing at half-nine this evening:

1. You could watch that Take That film documentary thing on ITV1.
2. You could hold on for half an hour for The Million Pound Drop, with special celebrity guests Jimmy Carr and Johnny Vaughan playing for charity.
3. You can go to Tom Scott’s site and partake in You vs The World, the professionally done live internet quiz show where nothing can go wrong.

I know what I’ll be doing, I LOVE Take That!

DS reporting Total Wipeout returning for two more series, new course for the fifth one.

I’m a bit bored of the US one. I wonder how it will stack up here.

12 Yard are now on Twitter, and it looks like they’ve got some creative-type jobs going. It would therefore be YOUR FAULT if their next shows get slagged off on here.

Meanwhile, Bother’s Bar chum Tom Scott is doing a live internet quiz thing on Saturday night.

This is actually a pretty good line-up if it’s true.

Quick rundown:

• Shaun Ryder
• Nigel Havers
• Gail Porter Kayla Collins, apparently.
• Britt Ekland
• Linford Christie
• Lembit Opik
• Alison Hammond
• Gillian McKeith
• Stacey Solomon
• Dom Joly
• Sheryl Gascoigne
• Aggro Santos. Expect “who the hell is Aggro Santos?” to go viral.

I predict Gillian McKeith to be the one who gets to do most of the trials this year. Let’s hope they’ve come up with inventive ones.

I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! begins Sunday at 9pm on ITV1.

Edit: Hammond and Joly not quoted in the official press briefing. Maybe they’ll come in for the inevitable first live trial.