It’s no wonder Britain’s kenoing mad

By | June 5, 2010
11 Comments

Doubtless you’ve noticed that late nights on ITV have a new look. A new teleshopping look with a two hour block called The Zone. The Zone is a series of three or four ‘blocks’ linked together by Michael Underwood and Angelica Bell, or Nigel Mitchell off of Quizmania and Zoe Hardman off of the awesome Playing it Straight selling holidays. Half of these blocks are live simulcasts with QVC, which I’ve always liked because I love live broadcasting like that. Another block is a simulcast with Challenge Jackpot’s Roulette Nation.

But it’s the other thing I want to talk about, Challenge Jackpot’s Bingo Stars which is my favourite segment of the block for entirely the wrong reasons.

It’s basically keno. You pick five numbers from 80, ten are drawn, the more you match the more you win. You can stake up to £10 per line.

Here is a very rough guide to the odds and returns:

Matched Rough Odds Return
1 5 to 2 Stake returned
2 9 to 1 1 to 1
3 81 to 1 9 to 1
4 1635 to 1 99 to 1
5 95,400 to 1 9999 to 1

As doubtless you’ve noticed, the house has a bit of an edge here and traditionally keno is the game that favours the casino the most.

But the thing with what is essentially a lottery is that the poor returns are mitigated by the fact that the big prizes are very very big. It’s the glamour of the gamble and what could be more glamourous that winning lifechanging sums on late night TV? Let’s take a look at a winners list:

bingo

Oh.

BB Live Feed returns

By | June 4, 2010
23 Comments

For some reason, I’m getting mildly excited about Big Brother this year, although doubtless I’ll have stopped watching it after about three days. But anyway, the exciting news is that the live feed is OFFICIALLY back, albeit online (hey! It’s just like the first series!) on the official site, and not free (Although keep checking the site as they’re giving away 1,000 free passes). All we need now is a camp homosexual and a black woman WITH ATTITUDE, and we’ll be right to the Big Brothers of old.

Big Brother starts on Wednesday night on Channel 4.

It’s BotherSOP Thursday

By | June 3, 2010
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pokertrophy2Can you believe this will all be over by the time the month is out? And I’m almost winning it, too.

Anyway blah blah blah poker blah blah blah money blah blah blah Sunday at 8pm blah blah blah details.

Show discussion: Wipeout US

By | June 2, 2010
10 Comments

I’m not going to get the chance to watch this until late Thursday, so you can use this post to discuss it if you want. If I could just ask you to direct all other stuff to the post beneath (or any newer posts that happen), ta.

Sarcastic Voiceover

By | June 1, 2010
16 Comments

I’ve just watched Four Weddings for the first time aka Come Wedding With Me and I thought it was quite entertaining. Except for the ironically nicknamed Steve “Sparky” Parker’s whose sarcastic voiceover really lacks any kind of the spark that Dave Lamb manages.

This led me to the following wacky thoughts:

  • Surely it’s about time there was a one-off show where sarcastic voiceovers get to sit in and judge other sarcastic voiceovers, whilst a sarcastic voiceover voicesover sarcastically.
  • I think this subgenre of gameshow needs to have its own name. Criteria is that it involves people judging each other at a certain thing whilst a voiceover makes sarcastic comments in the background and purporting to be about one thing but actually being about, you know, people. This includes Come Dine With Me and Four Weddings, but does not include shows like Coach Trip which lacks the responsibility element. What should this subgenre be called?
  • They’re making special US editions of Come Dine With Me for BBC America. Is this going to work?
  • Where else can the genre go? I notice they’ve done Four 21st Birthday Parties (clever title, that), House Guest (dinner parties AND staying over), that thing with the B and Bs, what next?