What is the worst catchphrase in the history of gameshows?

By | February 2, 2011

And I don’t mean Mark Curry’s Catchphrase, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh Jeremy.

The reason I ask this is because the ever entertaining TV Ark have put some new titles and credits up, including the original Michael Groth series of Four Square (the John Sachs version of which is, of course, a Bother’s Bar favourite). Forget the slightly baffling idea that the original set was a bit better than the dark poky warehouse Sachs got for his first run.

However just before the credits, Groth and a very half-hearted audience chant “what a surprise! He doesn’t want the prize!” This, obviously, is lousy. But has there been lousier and what was it?

31 thoughts on “What is the worst catchphrase in the history of gameshows?

  1. JC

    “3… 2… 1… Stop cooking sausages!” – Iron Chef (I’ve been watching too much Harry Hill)

    Reply
    1. Ryan

      I don’t think that was Iron Chef – wasn’t it first from |Young Butcher of the Year” or something like that?

      Reply
      1. Alex

        It wasn’t REALLY a catchphrase as it was only a one-off, and the main thing Harry Hill mocked was “It’s Sausage O’Clock.”

        However, from Iron Chef, we do have “It’s morsel combat here in Kitchen Stadium!”

        Reply
  2. Andy "Kesh" Sullivan

    Surprised no-one’s mentioned “I’ll reveal the answer in 5…” and “No likey, no lighty” yet 😀

    Reply
    1. Brig Bother Post author

      ‘No likey, no lighty’ is brilliant though.

      Also, I would like to think there is difference between precedual repetition and actual catchphrases.

      Reply
      1. Des Elmes

        XYZ also had “Letters Play!”

        Does anyone know if George Marshall is still going around doing Sean Connery impressions?

        Reply
  3. Paul Brassey

    I was quite proud of “Don’t put all your Eggheads in one basket!”

    Although I was annoyed that I was subsequently introduced to everyone associated with the show (commissioners, host, Eggheads) not as “Paul, who put together the format” but “Paul, who wrote the “Don’t put all your Eggheads in one basket!” line.

    Unless I’ve forgotten I don’t think “Start the machine” was mine.

    Reply
      1. Mart with an Y not an I

        Didn’t Tarrant alternate it between “I start it – You stop it” and “Start the machine”?

        I seem to remember he used those two, in that lost Saturday Afternoon I had in Studio 1, ITV Studios London in November 2009…

        Reply
  4. Netizen

    I know it’s not typically lousy, but I’ve always hated “…and never a cross word!” with a passion. Inexplicably grating.

    Reply
    1. Netizen

      Are you implying that Aton Du Berk’s rendition is actually better?!

      Reply
      1. Travis P

        At least “Bring on the Wall” is better than Cartoon Network’s Hole in the Wall catchphrase with “Show us the hole in the wall”.

        Reply
        1. James E. Parten

          At that the CN line is more acceptable than “It’s time to face. . . The HOLE!”, used on the Fox network version a couple of seasons back. But then, CN did manage to bring some fun to a format that doesn’t need too much in the way of gravitas.

          Reply
  5. art begotti

    There’s always been something that’s grated me about “And what is a Hot Spot not?” and “And what’s the prize?” and their audience-shouted responses. They’re probably not the worst ones out there, but they’ve always rubbed me the wrong way.

    Reply
    1. Brig Bother Post author

      I had no idea what the correct audience response for “What is a hot spot not?” for years unti I watched it with subtitles once (“not a good spot,” apparently)

      Reply
  6. Netizen

    ‘When you know, off you go’ – a bit weak, but I suppose it accurately describes the rules.

    Reply
  7. The Banker's Nephew

    “Ladies, please…” That always bugged me.
    “Let’s step up and see what drops!” Could just be I just missed “Move your money back!” (I like alliteration), but it seemed rather forced to me.

    Reply
  8. CeleTheRef

    in Italy we have Enrico Papi as the dispenser of awful catchphrases, most of them on Wheel of Fortune

    “€ 0! you don’t win and don’t lose anything”

    “€100! few but good” (even if it was the Final Spin and the leader was €2000 ahead)

    and on Prendere O Lasciare he used to say: “you valued that prize at X euro.
    But that’s not the actual price. Because the actual price is…”

    and quite a few times it really was X -_-‘

    Reply
  9. CMD in yet another browser

    And Dave should do a panel game about Mongolia so it could be, etc.

    I’m more fascinated by that Four Square conclusion in gameplay terms. Does it look to anyone else like they were going for a $ale of the Century-style “save up your points won over several shows to try to buy a better prize” routine? Pretty snazzy if the case.

    Reply
    1. Brig Bother Post author

      Yes I think that’s the case, what I seem to remember about it was that a) games could straddle, b) games were quiz/pair the squares only and c) The Maze was used as a bonus round.

      Reply
  10. Matt C

    I do hold a suspicion that one of the major reason Ed Tudor Pole’s hosting of The Crystal Maze always gets criticised is that he never really found an adequate alternative to “Will you start the fans, please?”.

    I recall there was one series of Strictly Come Dancing where it seemed that Brucie was trying to make a new catchphrase happen; he’d keep saying “Strictly Strictly”, usually when referring to a dance. That never went anywhere, but it was too consistent to be entirely random, I think.

    Reply
  11. Brekkie

    “You are live on Channel 4. Please do not swear”. That really pissed me off, especially since BB9 when evictions were never live and always preceded an hour of highlights filled with four-letter words!

    And not technically a catchphrase, but really annoys me how the “Big Balls” seem to have become the “Big Red Balls” on Total Wipeout.

    Reply

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